Somebody needs to help me get to the bottom of this. I understand why married couples might renew their vows on a 20th or 25th or 50th anniversary, but we’ve got some celebrity couples who renew their vows before the ink is dry on their original wedding license!
So what’s up? Is it because they have nothing better to do with their money, and it was so much fun the first time? Do they think their marriage will last longer if they renew their vows repeatedly? Jennifer Lopez and Mark Antony have been married for four years, and they renewed their vows last month.
A Theory Emerges
I think I have an answer—in Hollywood, one year of marriage is equal to five years of marriage for non-celebrities. Now it begins to make sense. If you think Marc and Jennifer are the only couple to jump on this bandwagon, consider this: Scarlett Johansson and Ryan Reynolds just got married a few, short months ago, and they’re already planning a second wedding. So are Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon. David (the King of Soccer) and Victoria (Posh Spice) Beckham have already renewed their vows, and they’ve been married a whole nine years. Amy Winehouse and Blake-Fielder Civil, married a year, renewed their vows in the prison where the happy groom is spending some time. And let’s not forget Madonna and Guy Ritchie, who were going to renew their vows, but got divorced instead. Now that’s the celebrity spirit of commitment I know and love!
Wedding Favors for Celebrity Vow Renewal Celebrations
After some deep thought, I came up with two perfect wedding favors these celebrity couples should present to their guests. The first is the “It’s About Time! Let’s Celebrate!” Champagne Bucket Timer (left.) And what makes this a winning wedding favor under the circumstances? Hey, it’s a timer that counts down from one to sixty minutes, the actual, average time of a celeb marriage. Ding! My second choice is the “Head Over Heels” Bottle Stoppers (right) with one for the bride and one for the groom. These bottle stoppers showcase the bottom view of the bride’s wedding gown and the groom’s tuxedo, which, as far as I’m concerned, makes it much easier to figure out where their heads are. Maybe we should check back with these same couples in a year or so to see if immediate vow renewal kept them together. They may actually have something there. Do you “star” gazers out there want to make any predictions?