Hetero Couples Don’t Have Commitment Market Cornered


Over the years I’ve enjoyed the friendship of a number of gay couples, and I could have told you this before they even did the study. Researchers from the University of Washington, San Diego State University and the University of Vermont studied a sampling of heterosexual couples and same-sex couples for several years, and their findings show that “gay and lesbian couples are just as committed in their relationships, and the legal status of their union doesn’t impact their happiness.” In fact–and this significant as far as I’m concerned–“same-sex couples were more satisfied with their relationships and reported more positive feelings toward their partners and less conflict than heterosexual married couples.”

Myth Debunked

The researchers found that regardless of sexual orientation, as the level of commitment increased, so did the ability to resolve conflict. Those of you who believe that gay and lesbian relationships aren’t built on the same level of commitment as heterosexual ones–it’s time to rethink your position which, I suspect, made it a little easier for you to oppose gay marriage and civil unions.

Boortz Nails It

I’m a big fan of radio talk show host Neal Boortz. No, I don’t agree with everything he says, but I’m completely in agreement with his view on same-sex marriage. Here’s an excerpt of his rant on the subject:

“So can someone tell me on just what basis I’m supposed to rant and rave against the idea of the law recognizing a committed relationship between two people who truly love each other but who happen to be of the same sex? Just what have I lost here? What am I going to lose if every state in the union steps forward and legalizes, as they say, “gay marriage”? Every single right that I have under the law today I will have under the law after gays and lesbians get their state issued marriage licenses.

Some of you are going to tell me that this is an affront to your religious beliefs. I respect that. But those are religious beliefs and have no role in the operation of government. Your religious beliefs are between you, your God, your family and your church. They are not to be guidelines for the operation of your government. Our government was founded on a principle of equal treatment under the law. Your religion may not be comfortable with that concept. Fine. Live your own life in strict accordance with your religious principles if you wish, but don’t try to use the police power of government to compel others to live by them also.

Some of the people who will object loudly to [gay marriage] will go to the corner store today to purchase their copy of People magazine and then wander off to their homes in time to catch Entertainment Tonight on the tube. They will ooh and ahhhh over the latest news and gossip about their favorite celebrities. These are the same celebrities who engage in a series of four-month marriages. They’re also the same celebrities who get pregnant and then wonder out loud in anxiously awaited interviews about whether or not they’ll get married to the father at some time in the future. Maybe so, maybe not. The Hollywood crowd has made a mockery of the idea of marriage and of raising children in mother-father households. If you want to focus your righteous rage somewhere … try Hollywood.”

A Prime Example

Think Britney Spears. Or even Jamie Lynn Spears. A fine, heterosexual family if there ever was one. I think the perfect wedding favor for Britney’s next marriage (or most Hollywood marriages, for that matter) is an invitation to the couple’s next weddings. Now that’s a practical wedding favor.

I’ve been married for eons to the same wonderful man, and I can tell you without reservation that gay marriage poses no threat to my own. How can I be offended at the marriage of two people who love each other as much as I and my husband (or any other hetero couple) do? If a gay marriage fails (as 50% of hetero marriages do in this country,) they’d move on just like we do. And if, as most religions maintain, it’s all about love, then there should be no problem. Love should be unconditional, or it’s not love at all. It’s not about what’s natural for me when it comes to love and romance. It’s about what’s natural for every other individual on the planet. When we all start paying more attention to our own relationships and less to those of others, I suspect that 50% divorce rate will be reduced dramatically.

I believe we’re here to be happy, period. And we all have an inherent right to be happy as long as our pursuit of happiness doesn’t affect the rights of others–not the beliefs of others, the rights. To enact laws that deny anyone their right to love someone and be happy is just plain arrogant and downright mean. It also proves that “Do unto others…” has very few disciples.